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How to Stop Taking Things Personally (and Why It’s a Helpful Skill)

Do you ever find yourself feeling emotionally drained, overwhelmed, and anxious when having to deal with difficult people or situations? It's common for us humans to take things personally because of the inherent judgments we make about our emotions and feelings. This can lead to intense stress and influence how we engage in relationships with those around us. As difficulty arises, it's key that we learn how to not take things personally so as to avoid unnecessary distress and develop healthier coping mechanisms. In this blog post, we will be exploring ways in which we can reduce anxiety by disconnecting from personal meaning attributed to events, behaviors, or words; providing insight into realistic exercises on how not taking things personally is possible!

Understand that it’s not about you - take a step back and look at the situation objectively

It's easy to get caught up in our own emotions and perspectives when faced with a challenging situation. However, it's important to remember that it's not always about us. Taking a step back and looking at the situation objectively can help us gain a new perspective and approach things in a more productive way. By doing so, we can better understand the other parties involved and work towards finding a solution that benefits everyone. Sometimes it takes a bit of humility and self-awareness to recognize that our own biases and assumptions may be clouding our judgment. But by being open-minded and objective, we can navigate difficult situations with empathy and grace.

Reframe Your Thoughts - try to look at the situation positively and from a different perspective

We've all been there: stuck in a negative thought pattern that seems impossible to break. It can feel like a dark cloud hanging over us, obscuring any glimmers of positivity. But what if we could reframe our thoughts and see things from a different perspective? By consciously choosing to view situations through a more optimistic lens, we can lift ourselves out of a rut and invite in new possibilities. It's not always easy to change the way we think, but with practice, we can train our brains to focus on the good rather than the bad. So why not give it a shot? The next time you catch yourself spiraling into negativity, take a deep breath and try looking at the situation in a different light. You might be surprised by the results.

Practice Self-Care - take some time for yourself, do something calming such as taking a walk or listening to music

We all have hectic schedules, and sometimes it feels like we're always on the go. It's easy to forget to take a moment for ourselves and just slow down. That's why practicing self-care is so important. It doesn't have to be a big production, either. A simple walk around the block or listening to some soothing music can do wonders for our mental health. Taking the time to focus on ourselves can help reduce stress and anxiety and leave us feeling refreshed and rejuvenated. So next time you start to feel rundown, remember to practice self-care and take some time for yourself. You deserve it!

Acknowledge Your Feelings - accept and observe your feelings without judging them

We all experience a range of emotions throughout our day-to-day lives. Sometimes we may feel happy, content, and at peace, other times we may feel anxious, stressed, or overwhelmed. Whatever the emotion, it's important to acknowledge it and allow it to exist without judgment. Instead of pushing our feelings aside or denying them, accepting and observing them can allow us to better understand ourselves and our needs. By doing so, we can learn to cope with difficult emotions in a healthy way, and move towards a more balanced and fulfilling life. Remember, it's okay to not feel okay, and acknowledging your feelings is the first step towards healing.

Avoid Jumping to Conclusions - don't make assumptions about others’ intentions or motivations

Human beings often have a natural inclination to make assumptions about others' intentions or motivations. However, this can often lead to misunderstandings and conflict. Avoiding jumping to conclusions is crucial if you want to maintain healthy relationships with others. By refraining from making assumptions, we allow ourselves the opportunity to ask questions and gain a deeper understanding of the situation. It's always better to seek clarity and confirm our suspicions before drawing a conclusion that may be unfair or inaccurate. When we approach situations with an open mind, we can foster stronger connections with others and avoid unnecessary drama. So next time you feel tempted to make an assumption, take a step back and evaluate the situation first. You might just be surprised by what you learn.

Ask Yourself Questions - this will help you clarify possible misunderstandings or misinterpretations of events

We all face situations where we struggle to understand what's happening around us. Sometimes, it's because we simply don't have all the information. Other times, it's because our own perspectives or biases cloud our understanding. It's important to recognize moments of confusion and take action to regain clarity. Asking yourself questions is one strategy to help you clarify any misunderstandings or misinterpretations of events. By posing simple, straightforward questions, you can break down complex or confusing situations into manageable pieces. This approach can enable you to identify key areas of confusion and ensure that you have a more accurate understanding of what's going on.

The steps and exercises outlined in this blog have the potential to effectively reduce anxiety and assist you in not taking things personally. It is important to note that these strategies may take time and practice to become proficient. The goal of this blog was to provide readers with an understanding on how to stop taking things personally. By looking at the situation objectively, reframing your thoughts, practicing self-care, acknowledging your feelings, avoiding jumping to conclusions, and asking yourself questions can help ensure that you won't take a situation personally. If you find yourself still struggling with not taking things personally or have any further questions related to this topic, we recommend contacting Paper Cranes Counseling for a free consultation.

Shavonne James, LCSW is a Licensed Clinical Therapist and founder of Paper Cranes Counseling, a private group practice connecting wellness seekers with culturally-affirming, holistic, care. They have openings for individuals that are working through matters of identity, interpersonal relationships, and the inner child. Contact them at www.papercranescounseling.com